A letter to myself

Yesterday I began to read a book I bought about a week ago (F*ck it: Do what you love; if you really must know). It’s the third book from the F*ck it Series and I LOVE IT! It’s hilarious, thoughtful and most of all good.

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Now, I don’t normally take orders from a book but when I do, I think it’s a good idea. And yesterday The F*ck it book had a good idea. The author said that we should write a letter to ourselves like we are 17 and then another one like we are 77. Since I want to be a little original I am not going to write either of them; instead I will write to my Future-self (1 year older me, to be precise).
Don’t ask me how this is supposed to go down, it’s a little weird, just thinking about it, but I thought it could be fun! And since the year has finally begun (Let’s face it January isn’t a month, it does not exist, it’s just there to get used to the new year. I start my year with February.)

If you didn’t understand what I’m doing here: I’m going to write a letter to myself and I am going to read it next year. I can already see that this will be a disaster and Future Me is already shaking her head, but it could be fun reading it next year, so let’s do this!

Dear Me,

Seriously I don’t know what to write to you. I guess I should list all the things you should’ve accomplished by now and I should tell you how you life is supposed to look like, right? Let me just say that this is going to be an awkward letter, but since you’re me, you’re going to understand (at least I hope so).

I hope that while you’re reading this, you’re in a good mood. Which means that 1. 2. 2018 is going to be a good day. And I don’t mean just in general. I want you to be happy, that’s the biggest wish I have for you. I want you to stay true to yourself and I want you to smile more.

I hope that you finished that first year of college; I sure hope that you can even read this on the 1st, since you’re probably studying for your exams.
You are studying, aren’t you?
Because this year you haven’t!

I hope you’ll choose a right path when it comes to the things that you want to do. I know that you are trying to put your dreams on hold to finish college first, but I hope that you are slowly progressing that way anyways.

By now, you should be crossing days off the calendar because something big is supposed to happen this Summer, I hope that you still have this idea in your head.

Now, I don’t want you to stay completely the same, I know I have to let you go eventually. I mean everybody changes and a year is a lot of time and a lot of things are going to happen.
Still I hope that nothing changes when it comes to the relationships you have with your friends and family. You know that they are important right? I don’t have to remind you about that!

I am really interested what you did with your hair! Is it still the way it was or did something explode in your mind again?

I just hope you’re okay. If I know you well (and I think I do) you made the same New Year’s resolution that you did all the years before and I hope that you stuck with it. I am trying as hard as I can to make your life easier and that in the moment of you reading this you are smiling.

I don’t really know what I am trying to say with this letter. I hope you grew, in any way you could. I hope you’ve learned things and met new people. I would be a fool to say this but I hope you’re a little less shy and that your confidence grew just for a bit (let’s face it, it would really come in handy).

One last thing, before I end this: did you get out of your head? Did you stop overthinking everything? Did you manage to do that? I am really trying here and I hope there’s progress till next year, so if you could send me a letter from the future to tell me to keep it up, that’d be great!

But nothing in this letter really matters. I love you and you know that, so really there’s only one thing I wish for you, one thing I always wanted (and we’re doing a pretty good job so far): no matter how you change, how you change you ways, how you change your dreams and your relationships, no matter what happens, just do what makes you happy. If by next year you decide to be a politician (which we said we will never be) you better have a goddamn good reason for it! It better make you the happiest person alive.

Just promise me one thing: when you stop reading this letter, you’re not going to go do something that you don’t want to. You’ll be 23 and I don’t want you to be doing something you don’t want to. When you close this computer, I want you to smile or cry (but not because everything changed or went to hell), I want you to smile because you stayed true to yourself and you are going to stand up and do something that isn’t forced but done with love and you are going to cry out of happiness because you are proud of yourself for accomplishing what you want.

I know what I’m expecting from you is A LOT and it’s okay if you won’t be able to handle it. I just want you to know that I want the best for you and if I don’t know what’s the best for us, I hope you know what it is in 2018.

I got to go now, I’m going to read a book! So, read with you later.
I love you kid, stay happy ❤

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